Curse the Beads
by Nekoyoukaiaila
Summary: Curse these beads. Just in case you didn't know, and I bet none of you do, slamming into the ground isn't fun. And it hurts. And the word... Why that word? Curse the beads.


Disclaimer: I own no one, and nothing! So don't sue me, K? K.

"SIT!"

Slam!

Lovely. Here I am again, kissing the ground. I cursed the beads around my neck for the umpteenth time in about two minutes. All I did was try to kill the stupid wolf! And she sits me so he can get away. Must she do that whenever I try to get rid of him? Perhaps the spell's worn off enough for me to lift my head…. Nope.

I let out a low "Dammit…" too quiet for any human to hear, along with a muffled "What was that for?"

"What?" She either didn't hear me, or she's very good at pretending. I curse again, this time audibly.

I lift my head and scowl at her. Don't I ask the same thing every time? Oh look! There's another me-shaped crater! I wonder how that got there… "Keh." I get up, and stare into the depression. Only three sits, and slammed about as many inches into the ground.

"Inuyasha?" She's looking at me, and even from out of the corner of my eye, I can tell her by her expression that there's another round of sits ready for me if I say the wrong thing. Curse the beads! I never had to plan what I said before she put these on! Ok, I'll admit I deserved them at the time, but can't she take the damn things off now that she knows I'm not going to kill her?

"Inuyasha…." Crap. It's the warning tone. I waited too long to answer.

"Let's go." I don't grace her with a more eloquent answer. We should head back to Kaede's village. Miroku and Sango decided to stay at the village when Kagome felt Koga's shards approaching.

"Why walk all the way out there to watch you and Koga get in another fight?" The monk had asked as he inched closer to Sango.

SMACK! "Yes, I'll stay here too," the exterminator agreed as she smacked him. It had left a very distinct handprint on his face that surely wouldn't fade for hours.

I was jerked back to the present when Kagome yelled at me, sounding exasperated. "Inuyasha! You didn't even ask me why I sat you! You always ask me that!" I freeze, and turn a twitching eye her way, then stare at her with a blank look. She's got a playful look on her face now! How can she switch from sitting me to messing with my head in such a small timeframe?

Ok then. I'll play the game until I realize nothing's in it for me. I'll decide on that after a few seconds. "Why did you sit me then?" I continue to give her my best "should I give a shit?" look, but she doesn't notice.

"I sat you… because…"

"Because…?" I'm still giving the look…. Notice dammit!

"Because you… Come on, fill in the blanks!"

I glare at her, then decide to humor her in this temporary (I hope) bout of stupidity. "I got sat because… I tried to kill the wimpy wolf?"

She nods. "And this happens… How often?"

I continue to play along, wondering if she has a point in there somewhere. "Every time Koga decides to "drop in", land on my head, and tell you to come with him so you can "Finally be freed from the dog-turd", which is about once a week?" Ha! He forgot to say that this week!

She's smiling again. I don't like that look. "Yep. And you get sat about… three to five times then?" I give a slow nod, still not liking the look she's giving me. "Ok. And how often do I sit you when he isn't around?" All of the roundabout questions start to make sense. I can't remember a time (recently) when she sat me, other than for trying to kill the mangy wolf! Her smile widens as she sees the dawning look on my face. "So I might be able to take these off…" She steps up to me and tugs on the rosary. "If you promise not to kill Koga." Her grip tightens. "If you do, then I might be able to do something about all of those sits."

I stare stupidly, realizing how close my freedom is. "Promise…"

"Promise what?" Damn! She's enjoying this isn't she? Lose the grin…. Lose the grin… Or I won't be responsible for my actions!

"Kagome! Dog-turd, get away from my woman!" And guess who jumps in, LANDS ON MY HEAD, and continues the usual routine. "I'm sorry Kagome, I forgot to tell you to come with me! You can finally be free of the dog turd!" Screw the promise, screw freedom. Get offa my head!

"IRON REAVER SOUL STEALER!" I attempt to slice him, but him and his mini-skirt (Yes mini skirt. It's almost shorter than Kagome's!) escape me.

He lands a few feet away, and turns to leave. "Another time Kagome! You can come with me later!" He runs off, and I move to follow him. That wolf is MINE!

"SIT!"

Slam!

Curse the beads.


End file.
